Wednesday, March 7, 2012

My No-No Items

There are a few types of clothing and shoes that will never appear in my closet. By this age, I feel confident in knowing what works for my body type. Doesn't mean I won't try new things or want to fall back to items I wore when I was younger and think I can still get away with (yeah, can't). But for the most part I know that pencil skirts and longer trouser lengths work for my bottom half. I still buy and own crop/ankle pants. I realize they aren't the most flattering for my stature, but I still like wearing them. I also know that anything complicated on my top half (bows, large prints) only exaggerates my ample chest. I also realize that I can't wear boxy blazers, but need a more structured fit (yay Zara blazers!).

First up on my 'No-No' list is ballet flats. I think ballet flats are adorable and I so wish I could wear them. Unfortunately, they don't provide enough support for my heels. When I try them on, it feels like I'm walking barefoot on Rome's cobblestone streets. A few years ago, I went through a series of cortisone shots in my heels for plantar fasciitis. I also had heel neuromas. I've had two cryosurgeries on my right heel with Dr. Marc Katz in Tampa that provided some long-term relief. Of course getting the weight off has also helped. But to this day, I still can't wear cute ballet flats. Just too darn painful!

Ballet Flats

Next up, corduroy pants. I'm already a curvy girl and have to go one size up in my jeans. Compared to the top half of my body, I am two sizes bigger on the bottom. I've got baby makin' hips but no babies. To me, corduroy is bulky and I really don't need extra bulk in my trunk. The last time I wore corduroy pants, I was nine years old. I had on a brand new pair and visited a friend down the street. Long story short, her German Sheppard attacked me, ripping my corduroys from hip to toe and splitting open my right forearm. Yeah, corduroys conjure up bad memories.

Corduroy Pants

Short shorts. I'm not in my 20s anymore. My thighs are not thin and no one wants to see my cellulite. During the summer, I usually wear Bermuda shorts or capris. I like cotton shorts with some Spandex and unfortunately most jean shorts just make me feel sloppy. I admire girls in their teens and 20s that can wear cute little denim cutoffs with flowy tops. But that's just not me.

Short Shorts

Last up is Empire Waist Dresses and Cap Sleeves. One summer while outlet mall shopping with my mom and sister, we walked into BCBG where I was promptly asked when I was due. At the time I weighed 130lbs. But because of my chest size, the empire dress protruded out. Too stunned to answer the sales girl at first, I stood there with a shocked look on my face. I finally answered, "I'm not pregnant" and grabbed my sister by the arm and left the store. What makes empire waist dresses especially bad on me is when they have cap sleeves. Unless you are a rail, cap sleeves hit at the thickest part of your upper arm and can give the appearance of a big arm.

Empire Waist Dresses

So there you have it. My big no-no items that will never grace my closet. What are your no-no items?

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  1. While I have some flats at home, I still prefer a bit of a heel. I almost feel as if my heels are lower than my toes when I wear flats. Also, my feet get cold, so I find wearing flats in the winter to be a quandry. I don't like them with socks so I end up wearing knee highs and that can get complicated. When I do wear them in the warmer months, I make sure I'm not walking very far.

    I agree with you about the rest of the things on your list as well. There are some things you just can't wear when you get past a certain age. Oh to be young again...

    1. Very true, Kathy. And there's some things that you just can't wear at all because of your body type, like empire dresses for me. Even when I wear brogues or flat oxfords, I have to make sure they have a little bit of a heel (.5-1") so that I don't feel like me feet are pounding on the pavement. I used to live in FitFlops as they were the most comfortable for my feet. I also have to walk around the house in either flip flops or padded slippers as I can't bear the wood floors.

  2. Your list is exactly the same as mine! I'm a pear shape and these things are just not flattering on me. The ballet flats don't work for me because I have dancer's feet (ballroom competition dancing). I don't miss any of these items though...they are just more casual than I like to look.

    1. I would like to be able to wear ballet flats as they are usually cheaper than their high heel equivalent (I'm thinking of the studded Valentinos I'm lusting after). But I'll stick to heels.